Congratulations, Mr. President!

In just a few short days you will have the dubious honor of presiding over the longest war in US history! Yeah!

So far, the United States has spent $275,000,000,000 ($275 billion) on the war in Afghanistan. Good job! Al Qaeda only spent $200,000 on the 9/11 attacks. Losers! We’ll show them what spending real money on a war looks like! How’s that war going by the way? Well, its not clear we are calling it a war anymore:

Because the task in Kandahar is so delicate, U.S. commanders talk about squeezing rather than driving out the Taliban. The military has struggled to come up with a description of the upcoming fight avoiding terms like campaign, operation and battle because because those words and others have annoyed Afghan President Hamid Karzai.

So the U.S. is calling it “Hamkari Baraye Kandahar,” which translates as “Cooperation for Kandahar.” Karzai simply calls it a “process.”

Whatever it’s called, U.S. military leaders say that unless it succeeds, the rest of the plan for pacifying Afghanistan is hollow.

(deep sigh)…How will we know of “it” succeeds until if we don’t know what “it” is? After spending close to $300 billion, we still can’t explain we still can’t explain what we are trying to achieve in Afghanistan? (banging head on desk)